Control

Out of Order

~ shawnaborman ~ 2 Comments

Howdy, howdy! It’s the first Wednesday of a new year. How is everyone doing so far? Is 2022 going to be your year? I basically just want to survive it without getting sick, same as the last two years. But I also want to start being productive again. I failed hard in 2021 with everything except reading and blogging. It’s officially time to suck it up and get back on track. I started writing again this week. I’m not diving back into my old standards, but I’m going to work my way up to them. Same schedule, just starting out with a lower word count. But as I was writing words this week, it got me thinking about my writing system.

I started working on one of the stories I began last year and gave up on. I always knew the beginning and I know the ending, my problem is connecting the two. But what I really noticed when I opened the file is that I never wrote the ending out. I couldn’t. I can’t. The idea of writing a story out of order makes my eye twitch. I don’t mean a story has to be linear. I have no problem jumping around timelines. But I have to start at the beginning and work my way to the end. Writing random scenes and pasting them together makes me feel icky. It’s kind of ridiculous.

One of the stories I gave up on last year flips back and forth between the present and the past. In my head, I had every present scene plotted out, but I didn’t write them down because I couldn’t work out the past bits that alternated with them. I don’t know why I’m like this. It’s not like it’s difficult to skip around and insert scenes wherever I want. I use Word. All I have to do is move the cursor. It’s not like I’m writing this stuff out by hand or even using a typewriter. I should be capable of doing this.

So many other writers I know actually enjoy writing scenes and putting them together like a puzzle. It sounds so freeing. Don’t know what to write? Skip ahead! Or go back to something else you skipped. Easy peasy. But no. I have to make my life difficult. Am I worried I’ll forget to include something? Nah. I’d be one of those people who put a giant boldly colored note to “insert scene here” or something. I’m probably just super anal. Definitely. I like control and order when I write, maybe some organized chaos. But not sheer mayhem.

What about you? Do you have to write a story in a certain order or do you jump all around? Were you one, then you became the other? Or do you mix it up and write both ways? Do you have any advice for becoming someone who can work out of order? As usual, feel free to leave your thoughts or comments or questions here or on my social media pages!

Let the Colors Shine

~ shawnaborman ~ 2 Comments

Hello once again!  Recently, a friend of mine released an adult coloring book (Enigmatic Mind, Vol. 1 by Shiraishi Art).  I totally encourage you to purchase it and a set of markers or colored pencils, and get to coloring!  Aside from making me want to shamelessly promote a wonderful artist, the release of this book got me thinking about other facets of my creative side (yes, I occasionally do more than write).  I used to cross-stitch, draw, paint, color, and do all kinds of artsy craftsy things before my hands decided to be evil and lose a lot of their range of motion.  It was all very relaxing.  So, I’ve decided to dedicate today’s post to alternative  passions, namely coloring and drawing.

Fishing
“Fishing” (Acrylic, 38¼” x 31”) by 6-year-old me for MDA.

When I was younger, I used to do a lot of paintings for MDA.  They used them to make gifts and thank yous for big donors and stuff like that.  But as I got older and my hands started screwing up, my mom started helping (read as: started doing most of the work).  I still draw sometimes, but if it’s anything more complicated than my usual flower design, I use my tablet (do they even call them that anymore, what with all these half-phone/half-computer tablet things?).  I haven’t even done that in a while since I’m too lazy to ask anyone to hook it up to my computer.  Honestly, the only reasons I draw anymore are either to design clothes or because I want to color.

Lunar
A gift I made for a friend. It says Lunar with Cyn below it (our nicknames).

One of my favorite types of drawing has always been to scribble random lines and color in the spaces between them.  It requires zero talent and gets you into the coloring portion of drawing pretty quickly (which is why I enjoy it so much).  Granted, my earlier pieces were simplistic and boring, but as I kept trying to make them more interesting, I discovered shading and even started hiding messages in them.  The piece above is one of my favorites.

On the rare occasion that I do try to draw people, I tend to focus on the clothes (I suck at faces and hair and hands and things), I always have.  Even then, I start with a line and work my way out from there with the end goal of being able to color.  No idea why.  I think it’s mostly because of that random love of designing clothes that I mentioned (I don’t usually wear fancy things, but it’s fun to imagine them).

Random Pose
Something drawn out of boredom. The dress is an oddly simple design.

It is an oddly refreshing experience to control something down to its very color.  You control the light, the texture, everything.  It’s very much like writing in that way, only more visual.  A lot of people equate creativity with freedom, but for me, it’s more about control.  I have complete control over the worlds I create, whether writing or drawing.  It’s kind of a relief when compared to living in the real world.