A Reverse Bucket List

Howdy, howdy!  We’ve all heard of bucket lists, those lists of must-dos before we die.  Some of you probably even have a list hidden away somewhere (or out in full view for everyone to see).  I don’t.  It’s not really my thing.  But did you know that reverse bucket lists exist?  Apparently, people also make lists of things they’ll never do before they die.  These lists seem to be mostly for people who have no idea what to blog about that day, week, month, whatever.  People like me!  So, even though I don’t like saying I’ll never do something (because who knows what the future will bring), I thought I’d share a list of ten things I can confidently say I’ll probably never do.

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1. Bungee jumping.  Why, you ask?  Aside from the fact that I physically can’t, I don’t think I would even if I could.  Something about falling toward the ground only to snap back up again and continue the up and down bit until gravity wins just isn’t appealing to me.

2. Going vegan.  I could probably do vegetarian for a day or two, but I like cheese too much to go full vegan.  And no, nut cheese is not cheese, it’s just someone’s attempt at making veganism fun with bad innuendo.

3. Skydiving.  Mostly because I can’t, but also because I have this thing about being suspended in the air without a firm foundation underneath me, so I wouldn’t even want to get on the plane.  If I could get past that, I might try this one.  But cripple privilege means I don’t even have to worry about being asked to try.

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4. Mountain/rock climbing.  I’d honestly try this if I could, but I don’t know of any wheelchair friendly mountains or cliffs.  So, yeah.  I’m fairly confident in saying I won’t be doing this.

5. Giving up coffee.  I don’t drink it often (once a week maybe), but I wouldn’t give it up.  Especially if it has booze in it.

6. Off-roading.  The roads have enough bumps around here.  Why would I intentionally go looking for worse ones?  No, thank you.  You can keep your whiplash for yourself.

7. Getting super hungover drunk… again.  Once was enough for me to learn my lesson.  I don’t remember much of that night.  It was just before my mother died and Dad and I got loaded with some of her family.  Dad’s a bad influence.  I’ll blame him.

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8. Finishing all of the books o my to-be-read list.  It’s just not possible, especially since I keep adding new ones.  Unless all the writers in the world stop writing, my list will keep growing.  There’s no way to stop it.  It’s a dilemma every reader must face and accept.  You will never catch up.

9. Seeing all the places I want to see.  I can’t fly and cruises are expensive, so I won’t be seeing a lot of places.  Add to that the fact that much of the world isn’t wheelchair friendly (stupid stairs), and there’s even more I won’t see.  But that’s what books and TV are for!

10. Giving up dessert. Just nope.

What about you?  Do you have a list of things you’ll never do?  Is it as ridiculous as some of mine?  Is it full of profound introspection?  Feel free to share it here or on my social media pages!

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