Stare Into The Abyss

Abyss for Sale

~ shawnaborman ~ Leave a comment

Hello, hello! How’s everyone doing? Things here are quiet and lazy. The past couple of days have been gloomy. Just generally blah. The severe weather stayed away from us, so that’s always good. But I have no idea what to ramble about. I have a tendency to mention wandering off into an abyss on Facebook when I have nothing else to do, so last week, a friend said one of my blog posts should be about my abyss, but written like one of those descriptions on Zillow (a real estate thingie). So, this’ll be a shorter post (Zillow descriptions are only 250 words? Ugh), but challenge accepted.

But first, did I show you my new glasses? Okay, now back to the description.

Here we go:

Luxurious, low maintenance abyss available for anyone seeking a secluded getaway from the hustle and bustle of life. The open floor plan allows for easy access to each feature even in the complete darkness of the void. Includes wide open space to flail around on the hardwood floors while reliving every cringe moment you’ve ever had. The standard box of doom has recently been renovated into a walk in closet of doom, perfect for plotting or simply screaming into the dark. The single bedroom offers room for a king sized bed and small sitting area, so you can decide where to lounge while staring vacantly into nothingness. An en suite offers both a jacuzzi tub and a walk in shower, so you can soak your troubles away while dwelling on that time the waiter said “enjoy your food” and you answered “you too” or stand under the scorching water to contemplate similarly important things in life. No need for a sauna as the abyss’s proximity to Hades means it easily maintains a toasty and oddly humid 106 degrees. The lack of a kitchen isn’t for everyone, but who are you kidding? You’re just going to order something in anyway. No yard means no need to spend time outside doing things like yardwork or talking to the neighbors. All of this could be yours for the low, low price of… if you have to ask, you can’t afford it! Call to schedule a private tour today.

It’s an abyss. What did you expect?

And I came in at 245 words. But seriously. This is my abyss and you can’t have it. Back to our regularly scheduled book review next week!

The Things I Do For Procrastination

~ shawnaborman ~ Leave a comment

Hello, hello! Welcome to June. Can you believe it’s already this far into the year? I’m still stuck back in March somewhere. I’ll be honest: motivation for productive things is hard right now. I know I should be writing something, but I’m also nervous because the only thing I’m drawn to is DS2. I’m currently searching for an agent for DS1 and I don’t want what happened with G&G and its sequel to happen this time. I don’t want to get deep into DS2 only to end up with a bunch of rejections for DS1, get disgusted with everything, and trunk them both. That’s too depressing. But I’m also not excited about any of my other ideas at the moment, so I’ll probably cave and start DS2 tomorrow. I’m just procrastinating and I know it. Just like I procrastinated before writing this post. And since I have nothing else to talk about, I thought I would explain what a day of procrastination looks like for me.

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When I get up, it’s a long drawn out process during which I usually have time to play my three mindless games on Facebook for a bit. During that time Dad makes breakfast. We watch an hour of TV while we eat, then we go out back and feed the fish (we have a pond). Afterwards, Dad usually goes out to work in his shop. That’s when the procrastination truly begins.

Today (as in the day I’m writing this, not the day you’re reading it), I came inside and did the crossword puzzle. I checked my email. Got something from Panera Bread about contactless delivery, which they’ve emailed me about before but never delivered to our address, so I checked again figuring it would be the same as usual. To my surprise, they now deliver to us! So, I spent twenty minutes perusing their grocery menu and normal menu even though I know what they have. I was that bored and desperate to avoid working. Sue me. Then, I decided to read a chapter of the book I’m currently reading to review on the 24th.

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It’s something so far.

I followed that up with slowly wandering around the living room and kitchen, then staring out the back door for a few minutes. I usually tell myself it’s because I need to give my eyes a break from the computer screen, but really it’s because I don’t know what to write and hope a change of scenery will help. It never does. And before I returned to my room, I went into the dining room to stare at the crochet stuff I haven’t touched in almost a month. It was a mess. The shawl was all scrunched up and the hook was dangling from the last stitch I made. Instead of waiting for Dad to come inside and help me straighten everything out (which would have taken all of five seconds), I spent fifteen minutes getting the hook into position and shoving everything around as best I could with my back scratcher so that it’s ready for me when I want to work on it again, but won’t fall off the table in the mean time.

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When I noticed it was almost six, I decided to get serious and write this post. This isn’t an unusual day for me. Granted, when I’m in the middle of writing a book or short story, I force myself to get serious closer to 4:30, maybe 5:00. But that’s only because I write more words and sprinkle in random breaks to stare out the back door or check my email or scroll through social media for five minutes.

What about you? What’s a normal day of procrastination like for you? As always, feel free to share your thoughts or comments here or on my social media pages!