Hello, hello! Happy New Year! Is it everything you were hoping for thus far? Mine’s been pretty peaceful, which is why I’m not entirely sure why I’m being plagued by irrational fears. You know, when you get that weight right in the center of your chest? That trembly feeling that invades every waking moment? At least until the cause passes, then you’re fine? Yeah, it’s been like that for the past few days. I just don’t know the reason this time.
Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of odd fears, but I usually know what triggers them. I’m not fond of things suspended in the air (bridges, elevators, and the like). That’s probably because of recurring nightmares of driving off a bridge into the river below. I also fear being around grabby people (I blame doctors and nurses who don’t ask before they attempt to move my arms and legs, which results in pain or worse). Needles. Large dogs (another recurring nightmare). Storms. The doorbell or someone knocking on the door (no idea why on this one). The list goes on.
I even get a minor case of the terrors when we’re going somewhere where I’m not familiar with the roads. Bumpy roads are a pain (literally), so of course my mind fills with visions of potholes and speed bumps and unkempt dirt roads the whole way to our destination (and that’s not including the surprise jolts of adrenalin brought about by Texas drivers). That’s just the way my mind works. Thankfully, however, Google street view has helped with this particular fear a lot.
But none of that explains the weight and trembles I’ve felt the last few days. The only things I can think of in the near future are a trip to the DMV (I’ve already looked at the roads), my birthday (they’ve never bothered me before), and an event at a hospital (I’ve been there before). Who knows? Maybe I’m just freaking out because I’m feeling a little lost. Maybe it’s something I’m just not thinking of. Maybe I’ll never know what it is and it’ll fade away as mysteriously as it came on. Fear can be a funny beast that way.
Anyway, this has been a glimpse into my paranoid mind. I suppose it’s good practice, looking at some of the minor fears that can weigh on people. They’re potential character traits. Someone who faints every time the doorbell rings? I could write that. How about you? Any fears that you feel silly for having? What about the ones that terrify you? Feel free to share some here or on Facebook or Twitter or G+.
I’m not sure what to post about next week, so feel free to send me some ideas or questions. Have a wonderful week!